Photo Credit: Melissa Blackall Photography
Patrick is a company member here at Forum and is playing our Lord and Savior Himself, Jesus of Nazareth.
—
I figured since it takes me about 2 1/2 hours to mosey out and join the cast onstage, I’d take a couple of weeks to make my entrance to these here cyber-procedings. Better late than never…
So please the court, my name is Patrick and I too am a Catho-hol-ic. Yes, like Guirgis himself and almost half the cast, I also hail from the mothership. I went to Catholic school, did all the sacraments, went to church every week, went to youth group meetings and summer camps building houses for the poor, and I worked in the parish rectory for a couple of years in High School before heading off to College, where all good Catholics go to fall away from the flock.
But despite my pious youth, there were always those pesky questions to wrestle. Questions which got me into trouble in grade school. Questions like: if God is all powerful and merciful and He gave me the capacity for sin and a mind to question his existence, then how could he burn me eternally for acting as He created me (or however I said it when I was 10)? Saint Thomas doubted and he was there. Now 2,000 years later, aren’t I allowed the same measure of doubt, if not more? A LOT more? And one other question: would god strike me down if I didn’t capitalize his name?
Owning my doubt and skepticism has been a huge part of deepening my faith—even though I rarely use the words “my faith”; it’s an ongoing challenge of reconciling what’s been passed down with what actually resonates deep down. Somewhere early on I heard that “faith is not faith unless it’s questioned,” which became my motto. And yet despite my beef with all the dogma, the core teachings of Christ have always been a guiding force: Love thy neighbor as thyself…Judge not lest ye be judged…Blessed are the peacemakers. Those are the big 3 as far as I’m concerned—they’re also the 3 that so many “Christians” seem to forget, which is one of the reasons people get turned off walk away.
As I grew away from the Church in my early 20’s, I went off on a sort of spiritual shopping spree and like a lot of people, I dabbled in eastern traditions—I got into Taoism, Buddhism, meditation & yoga and devoured a slew of new-agey books that rocked my world. All this searching continued to challenge the hogwash of institutional Christianity, while deepening my belief in all the good stuff that stuck with me. And it raised even more questions: is there really a difference between: prayer and meditation? salvation and enlightenment? the holy spirit and the Dharma? Do Jesus and Buddha hang out?
What I’ve come around to is that regardless of country or culture, the real point of religion is to raise our consciousness and bring us into the presence of the eternal, the divine, the universal mind, God, whatever you want to call it. That’s why I’m always drawn to the mystical traditions of any faith—the Sufi poets of Islam, Francis of Assisi and the Jesuits, the Gnostics, and even some pagan traditions. Every religion has its mystics and saints and every religion has its fundamentalists for whom their faith is no more than a battleground and a weapon of fear. Because religion is ultimately a language to communicate with God, and just as no language can rid the world of miscommunication and confusion, no religion is a direct and perfect channel to the divine.
And religion is definitely not the only channel we have. The arts—storytelling, poetry, music, painting, dance—all share the goal of reaching a higher consciousness. That’s why religion has always incorporated the arts, because they help us communicate with the intangible and what’s more intangible than this thing we call God? In our modern culture, we often separate art and religion—there’s a mutual contempt that’s sadly grown between the two. This show has been a beautiful meeting of those two worlds for me, a place where storytelling, poetry and a little music come together in a room to wrestle with some really big questions.